Hump Day Humor #1

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This is a personal meme that I created at Mercedes Rocks. Mercedes Rocks is my other new blog that will host two memes for now. Hump Day Wednesday and Scrumptious Sunday. I will be participating in this meme each Wednesday.

 

Hump Day Humor: I was inspired to start this meme when I realized I personally needed a Wednesday meme with words (I already participate in Wordless Wednesdays). This meme is for  participants to post anything humorous on Hump Day~Wednesday~to add a little humor to our lives to help us get through the rest of the work week.  Right now I will post a theme for your post to go with, or I might ask some humorous questions to be answered for this meme. Please visit Mercedes Rocks to participate in this meme and check out the page on About These Two Memes to learn more about these two memes, frequently asked questions, more hints about memes, and Mr. Linky.

 

Feel Free to join in and I hope this makes your Hump Day brighter!

 

Theme for Hump Day Humor First Edition

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

~POEMS~

 

POEM FOR MOM

 

My son came home from school one day,

With a smirk upon his face.

He decided he was smart enough

To put me in my place.

           

“Guess what I learned in Civics Two

that’s taught by Mr. Wright

It’s all about the laws today.

The ‘Children’s Bill of Rights.’

         

It says I need not clean my room,

Don’t have to cut my hair

No one can tell me what to think,

Or speak, or what to wear.

                

I have freedom from religion,

And regardless what you say,

I don’t have to bow my head,

And I sure don’t have to pray.

                   

I can wear earrings if I want,

And pierce my tongue & nose.

I can read & watch just what I like,

Get tattoos from head to toe.

          

And if you ever spank me,

I’ll charge you with a crime.

I’ll back up all my charges,

With the marks on my behind.

           

Don’t you ever touch me,

My body’s only for my use,

Not for your hugs and kisses,

that’s just more child abuse.

                   

Don’t preach about your morals,

Like your Mama did to you.

That’s nothing more than mind control,

And it’s illegal too!

              

Mom, I have these children’s rights,

So you can’t influence me,

Or I’ll call Children’s Services Division,

Better known as C.S.D.”

               

Mom’s Reply and Thoughts

           

Of course my first instinct was

To toss him out the door.

But the chance to teach him a lesson

Made me think a little more.

            

I mulled it over carefully,

I couldn’t let this go.

A smile crept upon my face,

He’s messing with a pro.

        

Next day I took him shopping

At the local Goodwill Store..

I told him, “Pick out all you want,

There’s shirts & pants galore.

            

I’ve called and checked with C.S.D.

Who said they didn’t care

If I bought you K-Mart shoes

Instead of those Nike Airs.

             

I’ve cancelled that appointment

To take your driver’s test.

The C.S.D. is unconcerned

So I’ll decide what’s best.”

        

I said “No time to stop and eat,

Or pick up stuff to munch.

And tomorrow you can start to learn

To make your own sack lunch.

            

Just save the raging appetite,

And wait till dinner time.

We’re having liver and onions,

A favorite dish of mine.”

                

He asked “Can I please rent a movie,

To watch on my VCR?”

“Sorry, but I sold your TV,

For new tires on my car.

          

I also rented out your room,

You’ll take the couch instead.

The C.S.D. requires

Just a roof over your head.

             

Your clothing won’t be trendy now,

I’ll choose what we eat.

That allowance that you used to get,

Will buy me something neat.

           

I’m selling off your jet ski,

Dirt-bike & roller blades.

Check out the ‘Parents Bill of Rights’,

It’s in effect today!

            

Hey hot shot, are you crying,

Why are you on your knees?

Are you asking God to help you out,

Instead of C.S.D.?”

             

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5 Responses

  1. I love this poem! So true.

    Thanks! If you have a good one~feel free to join two of us-lol- at Mercedes Rocks to participate: http://mercedesrocks.wordpress.com! WOOF!

  2. here’s a link to my poem that I posted a couple days ago… It’s about winter.

    http://itisjustallaboutme.wordpress.com/2008/02/25/a-winter-poem/

    Hilarious-short, but to the point. If you wish~please post this comment with the link on the Hump Day Humor meme site at Mercedes Rocks (so I can have a third participant-lol): http://mercedesrocks.wordpress.com

  3. Thst’s such a funny poem! Thanks for sharing it. Wow, I’ve missed a lot of stuff lately! I was busy all week last week going to workshops preparing to take the big state test to get my ESL certification, then took the test last Saturday.

    I’m going to have to get busy here. I have made up quite a few things and am holding them for March (You know). Four of them I called sunday Supper and planned to post on Sundays in March. Great minds and all that. I’ll probably link them to your meme now that I know about it!

    Good for you! Good Luck on your results! Yes, please do link to my meme-I would really appreciate it. I’ve gone meme crazy to give me something I am accountable for each day for March~woohoo! I’ve had the other blog as long as I have had this one~just wan’t sure what I wanted to do with it~now I do-just hope it lasts. Feel free to spread the word. Mercedes Rocks: http://mercedesrocks.wordpress.com! WOOF!

  4. I LOVE THIS! I’ve never read it before. Thanks so much for sharing. Deb

    You’re so welcome!

  5. Happy Hump day to you also! This poem was great! I have a 13 year old so I can relate ha-ha

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