Nervous!

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Ok-here goes. I am getting nervous. Lets zoom back in time. On August 23, 2007 I went for a screening mammogram. I got the results back on Wednesday, August 29, 2007:

There is an area on your mammogram that requires further evaluation. I recommend that you return for special views of the left breast and an ultrasound examination of the left breast. An ultrasound is sometimes necessary in order to obtain a more diagnosis than that provided by standard imaging alone.

After reading this letter, I started into panic mode-panic attack. Breath…in deep…out slowly…in deep…out slowly…calm down…close eyes…go to happy place…light bulb goes on in my head. A couple of years ago I had been having pains in my left breast-MY LEFT BREAST. Hhhmmm. Any relation? I had had an ultrasound of my left breast back then and had discovered that I have fibrous cysts. Maybe this is all it is. Then I went from Panic to Mad mode.

I thought back to my yearly wellness exam and recalled the breast exam. My doctor only examined my left breast-if I recalled correctly. I wanted to talk to my doctor. I wanted to know if he scheduled a mammogram just for a routine check-up-I am only 35 years old, or did he schedule a mammogram because he had felt something-in my left breast. So the next day I called the doctor’s office and left a message for him to return my call. I called later on in the day and left another message for him to return my call. LATER in the evening, a lady from the doctor’s office called me and asked what I needed to talk to him about-I told her, “Like I have already said in my TWO previous messages, I would like to speak with him about my mammogram results and about my wellness/pap exam…”. She said, “Oh, Ok. Well, he usually returns calls at the end of the day after he has seen all of his patients. He will return your call after he is through seeing patients.”

OK-Three phone calls with the doctor’s office in one day. By the way-my doctor never returned my phone call. So here I go again back into PANIC mode-crap-breath-in deep and slowly…out…slowly…breath…in…and out…

The next day, I called the doctor’s office-again-and left a message for my doctor to return my call-again. A nurse returned my call. I went on and asked her the questions I had-I like her and I figured this is the only way I will find out quickly. So, I asked her if my doctor scheduled a mammogram for a routine check-up or because he had felt something. She told me that it was just a routine screening mammogram. She said that if he had felt something he would have told me and would have scheduled a diagnostic mammogram. Whew-I am feeling much better now-I think.

I asked the nurse if I could do an ultrasound on both breasts-If they’re gonna do one-they’re gonna do both. I hear that ultrasounds can be a better test that mammograms nowadays. She said that was fine-so we scheduled my ultrasound-This Friday, September 21, 8:30 a.m.

In the next few weeks, I talked to several people about mammograms and breast cancer. A doctor’s wife told me that the hospital I went to almost always has everyone come back for an ultrasound-then come back for a diagnostic mammogram. My aunt said she has been through this same procedure too. A good friend has been through this and had a biopsy too. I am beginning to feel better-like this is a normal routine procedure. I know my boyfriend’s mother is probably worried though. She lost her sister to breast cancer-and she is always in my mind during all of this too.

I began researching fibrous cysts on the internet. When I found out I had this a few years ago-I thought it was no big deal. I didn’t really research it much. Now I am reading that this can lead to breast cancer-Great-Panic Mode-Again.

I am getting nervous.

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7 Responses

  1. Mercedes,

    Just thought I would stop by and check out the new blog. I will keep my fingers crossed for you and say a prayer, too. My Mom was just diagnosed with breast cancer about 3 weeks or so ago. It’s been a crazy turn of events for us, but the doctors think they caught it really early, so we are keeping positive.

    Glad to see you’re beyond PT. Stop by any time. 🙂

    Semi~Charmed

    Thank you. I will keep my fingers crossed for your mother and your family too. Saying a prayer…Please keep me updated.

  2. You will be in my prayers. I had this type of situation on a screening mammogram; it wasn’t felt to be malignant, just something that needed to be re-checked. I have 2 small kids, so I was very concerned. I had a diagnostic mammogram, which was normal. It showed more density (more tissue) on one side than the other. This is not uncommon, evidently.

    Jazzy

    Thank you! I am hoping that it is only the fibrous cysts that I already know about.

    What I need to do now is to remember to “Never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you”.

    p.s. I am so slow or behind-just realized who you were. Hello to you! Glad to hear from you. Thanks for stopping by. Tell everyone I said hello-been busy-working 12 hour days at school and then coming home to do more on computer.

  3. I can’t imagine how you must feel. Although, whenever I’m scheduled for a routine mammogram I am scared to death they’ll find something and my mind begins to race…how will I react if they do find something? What will happen to my children? Then when I do have the mammogram and if by chance they need to do another round of films I’m convinced they’ve found something. But I have found rechecking is a common practice. I make it a habit to ask a thousand questions of at least the nurse (god forbid you could ever talk to the doctor) and that usually eases my panicky mind. I can also relate to your frustration when trying to eliminate the nurse as a go between. I actually wrote about this recently in my blog and find it infuriating. Best of luck and I hope all turns out well for you!

    Thank you for your comments and thoughts. I stopped by your blog and will be stopping by more in the future.

  4. Just relax. Everything will be fine…

    I know-just breath. We have a field trip to the Fair on Thursday and I have a class that is WOW this year-I’m scared to take them…hehe. Then-when we get back from the fair, I have Parent/teacher conferences from 3-9 that night. Thank goodness I have already been having conferences so that I am not having to meet with parents all night and be “stressed” then-the night before the ultrasound. I only have to meet with 6 parents at the most-yeah. That will help. I will work on that narziss-relax. Thanks.

  5. Will keep you in prayers. I had an ultrasound a couple of years ago and I too had all those thoughts.Everything turned out fine, as it will for you.
    God Bless!

    Thank you for your prayers. I feel that everything will be ok too. I do know I will be nervous at the hospital-VERY normal for me-finally figured it out. So I will take something before to relax my nerves and should do just fine. I am a very tense person that doesn’t even know how to literally relax my body-gotta start doing that. Thanks again.

  6. Thanks for the prayers for my Mom. You are in ours as well. Keep positive and try not to worry. Worry causes stress that you don’t need right now. Things are currently looking good for my Mom and we are keeping very positive.

    Praying-keep me posted-I am interested in all of this now-no matter what my results are.

  7. Mercedes, I just said a prayer for you…
    Stay happy!

    Thank You!

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